Corey Joshua’s Birth Story - pt. 2
After having my sweet boy, I had planned to wait to cut the cord until after delivering my placenta. My midwife let me know that wasn’t possible because I was bleeding an abnormal amount. After cutting the cord, delivering the placenta, and getting the bleeding to stop, I moved to the pool for a herbal bath. I had a few sweet words with my tiny best friend about her new brother and how excited we were. Things after that became a blur. I remember people looking at me and asking me questions. I remember answering them in my mind and wondering why I wasn’t talking. I was getting frustrated because I felt miles away from my new baby and I couldn’t move. It was really like a bad dream where you’re running so fast but not moving. I remember saying I was getting dizzy and my midwife recommended I get out of the water. (Not sure which came first) I walked to the other side of the pool, went to climb out and I opened my eyes on the floor. My husband still had our baby and was letting me talk to him while my midwife was doing what she could to stop a second hemorrhage. Next thing I knew I was waking up to my husband and best friend patting my face, telling me that I couldn’t die and I had to fight for my kids and to think about them. I remember thinking, “what are you talking about? I’m not dying. There’s nothing to fight because I’m okay???” But while my mind was talking and I was answering, the only words I remember being able to get out was that I was getting stressed out. Which now makes me giggle. 😂 Everyone else was like, “😑 you’re kidding right?! WE were stressed out!” Lol They ended up calling 911, but my midwife got the bleeding stopped manually.🥴 I remember very little during this whole time. A few things I do remember was asking, “can I get dressed before we go to the hospital?” while my midwife’s arm was still inside me. I was asked if the baby was coming with us to the hospital and I looked at my midwife and she said, “I wouldn’t do that because they will admit him.”
During one of the times I blacked out. I was talking to people, answering questions, etc., but after a few minutes I would ask if I had been asleep because I didn’t remember anything.
And that brings us to this video…
My beautiful, talented birth photographer gifted me this video and I had no idea she had made it.
I had to make the easy (but disappointing) decision to leave my newborn at home while I was transferred to the hospital. God had been preparing me for this the whole time and I didn’t even know it.
1. A few months prior I was introduced to @TheAutonomyMommy and she honestly prepared me for how unpredictable birth can be and how I could be prepared for the worst without fear, but even if something happens, I could still have a beautiful birth experience. (Side note: she ended up training me to be a doula 😉)
2. That lead me to preparing for a hospital transfer without anxiety, including hand expressing colostrum with @madetomilk ‘s collection kit so my baby was able to have that while I was gone.
3. People had randomly mentioned hemorrhaging (not just about the possibility for me, but other people’s stories) multiple times leading up to my experience so I was not taken off guard or thinking “I didn’t know something like this could happen!” I did…
I’ve heard so many times, “don’t you wish you had been in the hospital since something bad happened?!” And 100% no… My labor, delivery, and minutes after were a DREAM. I was supported, empowered, and I felt like I was in complete control of my birth. I can tell you that even a year later, I was not traumatized by my birth experience. I am an example of “birth is not an emergency until it is.” I used the hospital for what it’s meant for and it was honestly not even needed it the end. I was 1 point from a blood transfusion, but my midwife had the bleeding stopped before I even got on the ambulance.
My birth team was wonderful and I felt so confident that my husband, best friend, and midwife were able to go with me to the hospital, my daughter was with my mom, and my new baby was with his big sissy (a voice familiar to him), my amazing doula, the midwife’s assistant, and my birth photographer.
I missed so many firsts with my sweet Joshua, but Lili documented them for me and made this beautiful video. I’ve cried so much every time I’ve watched it. I love reliving that day.
