Corey Joshua’s Birth Story - pt. 1

I am so excited to share the story of the delivery of this little boy that we were told on October 20, 2020 we would be having. We had not told anyone that we were planning on trying for a baby the following year. Nor had we told anyone that we had both already been preparing for pregnancy for months before this. We were approached by a lady in our church telling us that she saw us with a little boy about 3 or 4 years old and that God was going to call him like He did Joshua in the Bible. We did not know whether it would be our next baby or if it would be a few years, but we knew we were going to name our son Joshua. I dove into the book of Joshua and studied it.

Preaching about Joshua from the Bible while Corey Joshua was in my belly.

In March of 2021, we found out that we were going to have a baby due on November 25, 2021. I did not know whether it was a boy or girl, but I was at peace with not knowing and did not have any ideas either way.

Fast forward to November:

My contractions began Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday from 1-5 pm, but never went anywhere. On Wednesday night, after our last youth event at church for a while, I arrived home, felt a gush, and went to the bathroom to find bloody show. I notified my doula and went to sleep, giddy, knowing that it wasn’t much longer.

Dinner with family Thursday night

Thursday there was not even one contraction. I felt normal just as I had for weeks before. I went to bed later than I had in weeks around 1:15 am.

I woke up many times with what I thought was gas pain and would go right back to sleep. Around 4 am, I woke up and realized I had woken up so many times so I decided to see if something more was going on. I fully woke myself up, went to the bathroom, went back to bed, and realized the pain was going away and coming back. I only thought the pain was consistent because I felt it every time I woke up.

I let my sisters know that I was having consistent contractions, but I was going to try to sleep, but I was not able to because of the contractions. I texted my mom and asked her if she would go to the store and grab some last-minute things I needed, then come to my house because I knew it was time.

I spent the day trying to do chores and finish getting ready. My doula came for our last “meeting” before the baby, but she also was sure that labor was on its way. She brought me some chai date loaf and labor tea and took me on a walk. Later she and my older sister left and told me to call if anything changed.

While my mom, Corey Paul, and Hannah watched a movie with Adaleigh, I got into the bath and then stood to finish washing in the shower. Every time I lifted my arms while washing my hair, a contraction would begin. I had been practicing for weeks to moan through it and allow my body to do what it was supposed to do. Two hours later I was able to get out of the shower and Renie returned to sit with me for the night while Hannah and mom went to get some rest.

Working through a contraction

After watching both Princess Diaries movies and starting Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen, contractions were pretty significant and lasting for longer than a minute. However, they never became consistent in duration or frequency for very long. It was around midnight when I set my phone down and took my glasses off and did not pick them back up. I told Renie, “I think I need Natalie,” my doula.

She arrived around 2 am and I had just moved to my room where I planned to spend the rest of my labor. Natalie sat with me through the night while Renie tried to rest since we were not yet at the point of contacting my midwife. Around 10 am after I had taken another bath and a nap where I was woken every few minutes with a contraction, Natalie decided it was time to let Michelle know what was going on. She told her that she would come by in a few hours to check on my progress.

Natalie had to of been sooooo tired, but she was amazing to me. I couldn’t have done it without her!

Even though I was in pain, Adaleigh really helped to keep me from stressing too much.

When Michelle arrived around 12:30 pm and she checked on the baby’s heart rate and my vitals, I agreed to a cervical check (my first and only this pregnancy) because she told me if I was less than 6 cm, everyone needed to leave the room so I could nap and prepare for delivery. I was 5 cm and 90% effaced at this point, so she decided to stay.

I was so tired after being awake since 4:30 the day before and having only two naps that were interrupted often by contractions. I told Renie “I need to lay down and take a nap or I’m not going to have any energy to push.” My doula told me that I could not stop moving or I would stop progressing. This is the point where I was doubting my strength and ability. I leaned over the exercise ball and cried from exhaustion and slight anger (sorry Natalie haha) because I did not think I could do it. My husband whispered words of affirmation (hello, love language!) in my ear and told me how proud he was of me. Natalie had me walk up and down our hallway, sway through contractions with my hubby, do lunges on the stairs, and move through contractions on my exercise ball.

(It was around this point that things started getting a little cloudy, so I will write from what little memory I have.)

I remember sitting on the ball because I was able to manage contractions and work through them from there. I turned on my Christian Hypnobirthing audio and worked through the increasing contractions. I bent over into a position that I had not tried prior but I just knew I needed to. I let my belly hang and felt relief through the contraction. In the next contraction, I bent backward and felt an intense pain that I had not felt in any of the other contractions. This was the first one that I had yelled through. Natalie said, “that was a good one! We need about 10 more of those!” I shook my head and said, “oh no we don’t!” LOL.

I am pretty sure this was the point I went to the bathroom to “hide,” but I also had a couple of other strong contractions while in there. I came out of the bathroom and was hit by another one that was “different.” I leaned over our ottoman at the foot of our bed on my knees to ride them out. It was then my midwife said, “did you just pee? Because I think your water just broke.” They had already laid pads down on the floor, but Michelle moved me to the bed because “otherwise I was going to have the baby right there.”

Fear took over because I knew I had just been at 5 cm and I felt like there was no way I was ready, but I could not stop pushing. Natalie told me I was ready and it was time and not to be afraid. As I got on the bed, my body took over and I didn’t have much control over my positions. It was okay because I knew that it was doing what it needed to to get the baby out. I leaned back on Natalie, husband and daughter at my sides, and felt the urge to push again.

Michelle told everyone that we were not going to make it into the pool. I felt for the baby and knew it was coming. I felt bulging waters and pushed through the contraction. I pushed on the waters with my hand and felt them break.

I felt the baby’s head crowning and I stopped pushing when the contraction ended but held the baby there to help things stretch. When the next contraction picked up, I pushed again, determined to get the baby out.

Renie was covering Ada from being splashed by anything, but she did not want to miss anything. She was so interested!

I had been set on catching the baby myself, but the pain on my tailbone had become so intense, I bent back in pain, squeezing my husband’s hand and my other hand tensed up. As the baby started coming out, Corey put my hands down to meet the baby and I was able to pull it up onto me.

Corey putting my hand down to catch the baby.

Michelle, the midwife, asked, “well, what is it?” And I was able to check and say, “it’s a boy! My little Joshua.”

Corey and Natalie looked up at Adaleigh and said, “you have a brother!” I was full of joy, relief, and pride. I did it…

There are a lot of gaps in my memory for many reasons, but the next hour went by faster than I even realized. I was able to hold and nurse little Joshua without having to fight for time with my baby as I had in the hospital with Adaleigh.

The cord was cut by Corey right before the placenta was delivered, then he was able to hold him while I got into an herbal sitz bath to relax.

My labor and delivery had been what I wanted and needed it to be. Did each thing go exactly how I had “planned?” No, but I was able to trust my body, labor, deliver at home, and I was content with the things that did not go the way I planned them to, just like I wanted.

I felt supported and empowered throughout my labor and delivery by everyone there. I was surrounded by my mom, my sister, my doula, my midwife and her student, my birth photographer, my husband, and my beautiful daughter. Then even when things took a crazy detour, things could not have worked out more perfectly. (More on that later)

My little one was so brave and excited to be there to see her brother come into the world. She repeatedly put her hand on my shoulder or forehead and told me that I was doing good. While in labor, she kept my mind off things and gave me so many hugs and kisses.

I cannot brag on my doula enough. Natalie knew the positions I needed to be in to encourage progression and supported me emotionally and physically. She fed me and made sure I was hydrated in labor and gifted me with multiple things before and afterward. She encouraged me when I was nervous and hyped me up with words of affirmation. I keep calling her my birth BFF because that’s who she’s become to me. She is more to me than just a birth support person, she has become a friend and such an important person to our family.

Lili was amazing. She captured the birth of our little man so well and stepped up above and beyond what she had to for us after I ended up at the hospital. She stayed for hours after she could have left and helped those who were still at the house. When the pictures of our birth arrived, I went through them crying… and again a few hours later… and again a few hours after that.

Michelle Ray is my superhero. My pregnancy was so good, delivering my baby was a dream, and she literally was a lifesaver. I could not have been blessed with a better midwife. I prayed for her, not knowing exactly who she was, and God provided. I still remember the day we had our interview with her and I knew she was the one. I normally take a few business days to decide on anything, but I was ready to hire her that day.

I prayed over every aspect of this birth. I prayed over our decision of midwife, doula, and photographer. I prayed over our decision to do a home birth, who would be at our home during labor and delivery, and that I would be prepared physically, mentally, and emotionally for whatever happened. God’s hands were all over my experience. I had a peace over every single decision that was made and I knew He was guiding our decisions.

Part 2 to come…

Photography by Lili B’s Birth Photography